Latest posts
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Our Goats Need Names
We added two lovely ladies to the farm, and both of them have beards. It reminds me of living in Portland, Oregon, but the rent is lower and these women are easier to please. One may have a bun, or possibly a tin can, in the oven. That is a goat joke. Please respect the…
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Make Me a Flat Earth Believer for Under $500
Make me a Flat Earth believer for under $500. Iâm looking for someone with a skid steer who can level a 28â x 12â pad for a horse run-in shelter. Now I know what some of you are thinking⊠âItâs only a 3-degree slope.â Yeah? Thatâs what I said too. Then I started talking to…
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BREAKING NEWS: I’m Apparently Looking for a Goat OB-GYN Now
BREAKING NEWS FROM THE FARM: Iâm apparently looking for a goat OB-GYN now. Yep. This is adulthood. Somewhere between buying a chainsaw and arguing over the price of gravel, I found myself wondering, âAnybody know a good obstetrician⊠for a goat?â Just brought home these two lovely ladies, and I gotta say, they remind me…
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Exciting News: We’re Having Twins
My partner and I have some exciting news weâd like to share with our family, friends, and everyone around Bloomingdale. Weâre having twins. Like every responsible soon-to-be parent, Iâve been doom-scrolling parenting groups at 2 a.m. Apparently youâre supposed to have a nursery, a birth plan, a registry, seventeen different kinds of bottles, twelve backup…
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Are Goats Ticklish? And Other Questions the Internet Failed Me On
There are no stupid questions⊠âŠwhich is fantastic news, because Iâm about to ask enough of them to get politely escorted out of Tractor Supply. Are goats ticklish? Hear me out. Iâve officially reached the end of the internet. Google has started contradicting itself. Reddit is 4,000 strangers confidently arguing with one another while a…
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I Built a Round Pen Shaped Like a Circle Going Through a Divorce
I thought I had shapes figured out back in preschool. Circle, square, triangle. Pretty advanced stuff. Turns out Iâve been freelancing with geometry my whole life because I somehow managed to build a round pen that looks like a circle going through a divorce. Less tears, more dirt than an episode of Jerry Springer. One…
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Apparently We Are Having a Baby
Attention Jefferson County horse people, apparently we are having a baby. Not a human baby. I already understand those come with hospital bills, sleep deprivation and an eventual demand for a car. This one comes with four legs, no health insurance and the ability to stand up 45 minutes after being born, which is honestly…