I Got More Hardwood Than a Viagra Convention in 1998… and I Need It Gone
So apparently I bought 12 acres of what might be black walnut trees.
Now, I’m not a timber guy. I’m a marketing guy who recently moved to Bloomingdale and somehow woke up one morning owning enough forest to make a beaver feel financially secure.
Here’s the issue.
We want horses.
The horses don’t want black walnut trees.
The internet says black walnut can make horses sick.
The logging guys say black walnut can make me money.
So once again, nature has created a situation where somebody has to leave, and unfortunately the trees lost the coin toss.
I’ve had multiple experts tell me these trees might be worth a pretty penny. I’ve had other people tell me every landowner in America thinks they’re sitting on a timber fortune right before finding out they actually own $17 worth of squirrel public housing.
So I figured I’d ask the experts aka Facebook.
If you’ve worked with a local logging company, timber buyer, sawmill, woodland management company, or some old guy named Earl who can identify a tree from 400 yards away while drinking a gas station coffee, point me in the right direction.
The property is in Bloomingdale, Ohio, about five minutes off the highway with easy access. This isn’t one of those Appalachian treasure hunts where you need a side-by-side, a chainsaw, GPS coordinates, and a blood oath to reach the trees. You can practically throw a log onto the road from where they’re standing.
I moved here from Tillamook, Oregon, I’ve seen forests. I’ve seen logging. I’ve even seen things that may or may not have been Sasquatch or a hipster from Portland cosplaying one for Instagram. But I’ve never been the guy trying to figure out whether his backyard is a retirement account or just a very tall collection of toxic growth pretending to be shade.
If you’ve got recommendations, advice, or know someone who buys standing timber, let me know.
Because right now I’ve got 12 acres of hardwood, a dream of owning horses, and a fiancée who won’t let me sleep till this is solved.
Pray for me.
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